I was lying in bed the other morning; I had already taken my ear plugs out. I am such a light sleeper (perhaps because of my early years of waking up to my dad’s night music) that I wear them every night. Suddenly, I cocked my head.
“What was that?” It was distant and fuzzy, but I thought I heard musical chords. In a minute, it faded.
But that moment immediately brought to mind an old story about my mom.
In 2000, she moved from Ohio to Florida and rented a one-bedroom apartment where she thrived for many years. I’m not sure if it was 2015 or 2016, but a series of events happened which began to show her decline. This story is one of them.
Over time, mom got very territorial about where she lived and how things should be. I can see that happening when a person lives alone; change is the enemy. She was 84 by then.
A young woman (maybe late 20s?) moved in next door. Mom felt she was too noisy. This was interesting since her hearing was significantly impaired by then. She wore hearing aids in both ears and still felt she missed out on family conversations when we all got together.
The woman had a boyfriend who often stayed with her. Apparently, they would occasionally play music late at night, which woke mom up.
Since sleep is a huge issue for my mom, this was a problem. If she woke after one hour of sleep, she was awake for the night; even with sleeping pills.
She told me she actually banged on the shared wall a handful of times to let them know to turn it down. Once, someone banged back. That response threw an 84-year-old woman quickly back into bed, terrified.
I was never in mom’s apartment at 1:00 a.m., but I made a point, if I was there in the evening, to place my ear on the wall to listen. Personally, I never heard anything. I wasn’t sure about her story, but I didn’t discount it either. I had seen the neighbor, and she was young. Young people stay up late.
Mom’s description of the music was strange. She mentioned it was unrecognizable. To her, it sounded like discordant, instrumental music. There was no melody.
But she was insistent that it was happening and even got the rental management company involved. This led to a board hearing. I’m not sure of the details, but I remember there were politics around that time in the apartment complex regarding owners and rental tenants, and I think this was partly the reason the company and the board somehow got the neighbor to move to another unit.
So, I was horrified to learn from mom one day that the music was still playing.
I froze at that news. Mom had influenced a move, and the issue wasn’t about the tenant. It was mom.
I started researching the elderly and “hearing music.” I found information on Musical Ear Syndrome or MES. And the primary cause for this condition is hearing loss.
Apparently, the music is a creation of the brain. They are referred to as auditory hallucinations. People hear songs or instrumental music, even though no such music is actually playing. MES occurs most often among older people. It is not psychological or a symptom of dementia.
“The brain collects information from the senses to help you comprehend the world. When your sense of hearing is impaired, the brain isn’t prepared to simply ignore this sense. So, the brain continues to seek input,” according to Healthline.org.
“Getting little or nothing in return, the brain fills in the blanks using what it already knows about the world. This can produce a variety of sounds. With MES, the brain chooses to fill in the blanks with music.”
I also found a blog by Neil Bauman, Ph.D., regarding MES. He suggested to a concerned daughter (whose own hearing-impaired mother was blaming a neighbor for playing music) to enrich her mother’s environment by exposing her to real sounds as often as possible with a variety of stronger listening devices. The more she heard real sounds, the less her brain would work at creating them. I thought that was interesting.
He concluded:
“I have found that it is very hard to get people over the age of 85 to understand that the music they are hearing is phantom. They don’t accept that this music is not real, so that approach may be a losing battle. Also, they may refuse to accept that what they are hearing is phantom because to them, hearing phantom sounds equates with being crazy, and no one wants to admit to that. Thus, they continue to blame the music on others (neighbors).”
And this was the status with mom. Even though I discussed the possibility that it was related to hearing loss, she remained unrelenting that it was real. In my mother’s case, I believe that there was some early dementia developing.
Luckily, the next tenants who moved in were only there occasionally, so it never was a problem again. I learned that there really was something else going on with the young woman’s parents buying and renting two or three units in the same complex, so my mom’s role in the board decision was more minor that I initially thought. It’s almost like they used mom’s situation to forward their own agenda.
And as for my own early morning song in my head, although I can’t explain it, I’m not too concerned. With good hearing, it may have just been connected to a dream. And I hope it always remains that way. Although it is not universal, hearing loss can be genetic.
Additional Resources:
Healthline.org
ScienceDaily.com
Hearinglosshelp.com
Photo Credit: Jan Krivec Unsplash
Leavingthedooropen.com 
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